This maybe the funniest joke I’ve ever posted. Or is a joke at all?

My name is The D and I’m running for President of the United States from fat women.

(you’ll have to visit the page to see the video)

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(These sound like they are from Steven Wright but I’m not sure. It didn’t say on the site I stole them from.)

• I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don’t know what to feed it.
• I had amnesia once — or twice.
• I went to San Francisco. I found someone’s heart. Now what?
• Protons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.
• All I ask is a chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
• If the world were a logical place, men would be the ones who ride side saddle.
• What is a ‘free’ gift? Aren’t all gifts free?
• Someone told me I was gullible and I believed them..
• Teach a child to be polite and courteous and, when he grows up, he’ll never be able to merge his car onto the freeway.
• Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.
• One nice thing about egotists: they don’t talk about other people.
• My weight is perfect for my height — which varies.
• I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not sure.
• The high cost of living hasn’t affected its popularity.
• How can there be self-help ‘groups’?
• If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
• Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I’ll show you a man who can’t get his pants off.
• Is it just me–or do buffalo wings really taste like chicken?